Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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