Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
how drunk are you?
Several
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
