guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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