YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
