So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
