guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
