At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
