dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
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Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
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She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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