I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
