Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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