WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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