so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
