Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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