can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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