first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
