she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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