Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I love having hate sex.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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