I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I wish you could order shots online.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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