woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Randomize
