I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize