I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
