Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
