it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
