I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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