The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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