Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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