i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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