so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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