I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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