One girl and one boy is just not enough.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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