I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
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