Who wears a wallet chain?!
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
