She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
