i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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