i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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