maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
