i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
you never un-have a 4some
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize