I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
