I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
