Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize