Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
