Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize