"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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