She's like a pop up book from hell.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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