so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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