I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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