his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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