you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
