Is it normal to miss your booty call?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
