ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
